you say more by saying nothing at all

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: s3renade; April 10th, 9:18

Current Mood:: blah

Current Music:: hammersmith

I'm an asshole.

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: s3renade; April 8th, 8:48

Current Mood:: anxious

I'm really nervous....

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: s3renade; April 7th, 0:21

Current Mood:: calm

why is Fredonia so awesome?

so, as of now I can't go see Brand New due to Velvet Brown =[ it better be worth it! Today was not so good, offered to play in area, I seriously hate how my nerves always get the best of me. I can play something amazingly in my practice room, put me in a room of 6 people and I'll fuck it up.

go Amanda

(no subject)

: s3renade; April 2nd, 15:03

Current Mood:: annoyed

Current Music:: hammersmith

Sometimes I just wish no one talked to me at all.

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: s3renade; March 31st, 0:08

Current Mood:: tired

"I lie. I occasionally steal . . . but I have value. In music, a value is the relative duration of a musical note. Did you hear that? A relative duration of a musical note. I don't know what note I am. But I can see it's vibrations all around me. Every note that's being processed has the ability to touch, tear, hold, and reverberate through someone's heart and mind. It's the chance to twist that knob - change your pitch and envelope . . . change your shape."

I'm swamped in work this week....

disregard this entry...

: s3renade; March 28th, 18:15

Current Mood:: creative

Current Music:: uhhh

this new everyday habit I've got going on is wonderful. I like days being a blur of good times and not remembering half of them the next day...yeah

oh and I also realized how girls say that all guys are the same because they're really not. I mean a good amount of people are shady assholes but notice I said people. Anyone, it's because they're asking for it. It's the girls who dress up all slutty and go out every night...they're looking for a guy but guys looking at her are thinking one thing because their minds work differently. A guy is much less likely to go up to the girl dressed in only jeans and a hoodie than the one dancing like a slut to some fake song played over and over on the radio....so yeah that's how

and that's the Amanda Rant of the Day.
thank you and goodnight

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 23rd, 0:58

Current Mood:: tired

I'm more nervous than jealous to be completely honest.

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: s3renade; March 21st, 1:30

Current Music:: streetlight

I'm inked :p

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: s3renade; March 16th, 20:58

Current Mood:: contemplative

Current Music:: Vaughan Williams

it's sad that in life you have to go such a long time without seeing a good friend that you don't even recognize them for a second when you do run into them...

I gained the new nickname of peanut butter today, I love little kids. I think I may have a change of heart in what level I'd like to teach.

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: s3renade; March 14th, 15:47

Current Mood:: bored

things change so quickly and no matter how much you attempt to make them the same or to put time on repeat for a while, it won't work...

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 12th, 16:25

Current Mood:: contemplative

Current Music:: Holst

"I don't even feel alive right now"

I had a discussion with someone today about how this is the first break we actually WANT to go home for. I checked out like at the beginning of this week. I am crazy busy during the day and then just want to have a good time later and end up staying up until about 3 or 4 every night and then waking up around 8:30am every day.

I will be observing/teaching at North Collins this week, so it's sort of not even a break but it'll be much less hectic than my schedule here.

Brass day was cancelled next Saturday, it's terribly disappointing. I feel especially bad for Andy, it being his last year at Fredonia. I don't want a last year at Fredonia; I really love it here. Good news is, Velvet Brown is still coming.

I can't freakin wait to go home tomorrow.

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 10th, 2:24

Current Mood:: crazy

Before I say something, I have to write what I did today. I got out of band at 2:52, put my tuba in my practice room, walked from Mason to Alumni, changed into dress clothes because I forgot I was performing in area and made it to chorus in McEwan at 3:01. Tell me how amazing I am....okay that's it.

in college, you turn into an insomniac.
As Mufasa would say, BE PREPARRREDDDD!

yeah, I am super gay, okay bye.

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 8th, 1:17

Current Mood:: cheerful

Current Music:: FROGBOTS!

Fredonia slowly gets better and better, I love this school.

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 2nd, 20:18

Current Mood:: okay

forgive and forget, life goes on.

I wish I was capable of applying that motto to my feelings...really really rough weekend, I guess it takes things like this to make relationships even stronger once everything is resolved. For once, I'm really really looking forward to my break in 2 weeks.

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 2nd, 12:17

Current Mood:: sad

everything can only get better from here....I hope

(no subject)

: s3renade; March 1st, 17:45

I don't understand..................................

(no subject)

: s3renade; February 25th, 22:29

Current Mood:: calm

Current Music:: Nocturno

school is kicking the shit out of me, I'm so exhausted but I still keep going. I get my work done on time, I practice more than any of the other suckers in my studio and I know that in the long run, this will ALL pay off.

Today made me extra happy because it wasn't so bitter that I couldn't stand outside for five minutes. I can't wait 'til summer....possibly Bonnaroo AND a really exciting sounding road trip. Only downside is I'll be returning to the hellhole in order to make the $$ to do all this shit.

I'm getting a tattoo next week, can't freakin wait.